Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Fix Your Own Shit First

I went to the gym today for the first time in 10 days.  I thought there would be a gym at my hotel in San Francisco but there wasn't.  It was a very small downtown hotel.  We did a lot of walking, but that's about it.  I brought my gym clothes to work yesterday, and didn't go to the gym.  It was the first time I've ever done that.  I felt burnt out.  Getting back into the groove after vacation is an adjustment.

Flash stayed in San Francisco with a friend of his for a few days longer than me, and when he came back he took the time to sit down and write down some goals for himself.  Please note, Flash does not makes plans.  He lives in the the now, 150%.  Organizing and planning for things ahead of time is not how he rolls.  Flash is... unhealthy.  It's a source of frustration for me.  I'm not health nut, but I just can't understand why he always puts in at the bottom of the priority list.  So when his list of goals involved really committing to working out and getting in shape I was more than pleasantly surprised.  He's currently going to the gym, but I feel like he does it begrudgingly, like he's just putting his time in and not trying very hard.  

I'm always trying to help him, being encouraging, making an effort to eat better, planning meals, etc.  I chose to re-do fitness again for me, because I thought it was important to boost my energy, that I didn't do as well as I could have before, but a secondary motivation for doing it again was Flash.  There were times where I'd be sitting in the apartment and I'd ask Flash if he was going to the gym, or if he appeared to be bored I'm suggest going for a run, or to walk the dog or whatever.  As I was asking him I'd always think to myself, "Do I feel like going to the gym right now?"  "Would I want to walk the dog right now"  A lot of times the answer was no.  I heard somewhere that things that bug you about other people are things that you don't like about yourself, or something to that effect.  Your lazy hypocrite girlfriend harping on you to go to the gym can't be that motivating, people in glass houses and all that jazz.

My thinking is that if I can change myself, that will be the best way I can hope to help change anybody else.  You know, be the change you want to see in the world, right? 

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