I find other people so distracting. Even though everything I read tells me that relationships with others are once of the most powerful contributors to happiness, I find other people to be huge distractions. A social life takes up a lot of time. On weekends where I make the effort to go out with people I find my to do list falls on the back burner.
The drama that comes along with the people in my current social circle is also very distracting. I care about my friends and find myself feeling affected by their problems. I have found myself thinking a great deal about their issues, their fights, breakups, etc. I'm am not an all knowing wise worldly person, but I have learned some lessons the hard way. I find it frustrating to watch people handling themselves poorly and have trouble separating myself from their drama.
Another thing I was thinking about was how my life gets tangled up with Flash's sometimes. We live together for starters. He also has a lot of friends, and I've been finding myself being brought along to his friend's events, parties, etc. more and more. At times I've found myself going to things I really don't want to because I feel obligated, or that it will look bad if I don't. I like many of Flash's friends, but at the end of the day we're not that close of friends. Of all the guys there's only one that I could see myself doing something with without Flash. Once in a while it's fun to go out with the group of them, but for the most part it takes a lot out of me. I don't really find much benefit to it on a regular basis. So that got me thinking, am I just a classic introvert uninterested in an active social life or are the people that I find myself in social settings with just not adding anything to my life? I find I have great conversations with people I consider to be my true friends. Where I live now I have a limited number of those friends around me. Should I try to cultivate more of my own friends, apart from Flash? Or should I embrace time alone?
I have the apartment to myself this upcoming weekend and I must admit I'm excited about it. It's rare the be in the apartment by myself for more than an hour, so three days is a big deal. No feeling guilty about not being excited to get drunk, not having to worry about being boring because I don't have any plans.
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