Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Accomplishment Goals

I have been staring at blank pieces of paper for several days now.  I feel completely disenchanted with making new resolutions.  Flash and I took a 5 hour round trip on Sunday to pick up our dog who was being watched by my aunt and during the drive down we created a huge plan for him and his goals.  We made him a budget, set fitness goals, and more.  On the drive back I tried to think of what I wanted my goals to be and I drew a blank, a blank that has yet to fill up.

I've spent the last 15 months trying a lot of different things.  Yes, I've struggled to find an effective system for setting up goals, but it seems to be more than that.  I can't seem to find anything I want to do.  Nothing excites me.

I just feel tired.  A lot of the resolutions I want to be successful at are lifestyle changes.  The kind of resolutions that you need to do day in and day out, like eating healthier, drinking more water, taking vitamins, flossing, etc., but I know (from a quiz I did in an Oprah magazine) that I am motivated by accomplishment.  I need the satisfaction of completing something, crossing shit off my list.  These lifestyle changes are every day from now until forever type things and I have a hard time keeping my motivation.
I don’t want to just scrap these types of changes; I know they need to be done.  I had an appointment with my trainer yesterday, and even thought I’d been feeling super tired and sluggish I decided to go anyway in the hopes it would kick start my workout motivation.  We were going super intense for about 15 minutes and I had to stop because I was going to vomit.  She was nice about it, said we’d reschedule and told me to drink more water and make sure to have a snack before the workout, blah blah.  Case in point is that I don’t take care of myself.  I probably don’t eat enough; I know I don’t drink enough water.  I focused on exercise and I made progress on that, but I’m not really taking good care of myself in a well-rounded way.
Flash’s goals include diet and exercise and I know he needs help to do them so by default I am doing them as well.  I want to do them and not doing them alone should help.  I’ll need to find a way to structure them for him to be successful, and hopefully by association I’ll be successful.
These goals are big should goals.  I want to start figuring out what I really want to do for myself.  To draw a complete blank when trying to make goals for myself is a red flag.  I want more ‘accomplishment goals’.  At the end of 2012 it would be something I can say I started and finished.  I climbed a mountain is an accomplishment goal. 
I need to find a way to turn every day no accomplishment goals into accomplishment goals AND find real accomplishment goals that are awesome.

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